True Love: The feeling when you first look in your child's eyes, the tiny little hand gripping your finger, and you can't imagine your life without him or her.

Monday, January 31, 2011

Trying to find my positive

I've been slacking on my blogging... I'm so ashamed. :) My life has just been so crazy. I know everyone's life is crazy, but this past week was a low point for me. I had my first big exam in Anatomy last Wednesday. I walked in feeling very confident in my studying - I knew the teacher's lecture materials inside & out. The problem was, he tested over things we'd done in our lab class as well. I hadn't looked at any of that material because I thought that would be pertinent to the Lab Practical (which will be this week). Needless to say, the first 1/3 of the test was like Greek to me. I was so upset & disappointed (I ended up with a C). I came home crying over it. Matt (who is not the best at handling crying) didn't exactly cheer me up. For all the wonderful things he does, he will never be a motivational speaker.

To make matters worse, I was so shaken over the exam, that I ended up bombing a quiz we had the next day. The quiz material I really did know - I was just shaken up from the previous day. When I realized how poorly I'd done on the quiz, the tears came again -- in the middle of class! I was so embarrassed! I hate being a girl sometimes! I hate losing control of my emotions. Luckily it didn't last long & I don't think many people caught it.

Now I'm getting ready for that BIG Lab Practical coming up Thursday (over the blood vessels & circulation system). I also have a Physics exam on Wednesday. Not a great week.

And, poor Matt has been having severe pain in both of his arms. He was tested today for Rheumatoid Arthritis today. We're awaiting the results. He's also going to get some tests done to see if it may be carpel tunnel. Neither diagnosis is great.

Let me get away from all this complaining! I'm trying to start a new daily habit (well, almost daily)- I'm trying to state out loud, or write down, at least one thing that I am grateful for. Since starting it, I realize just how wonderful my life is. I mean, I've always known I had it pretty good, but being grateful for even small things every day is just empowering. My outlook has somewhat improved- I've got a little ways to go though (obviously, from my ranting earlier).

My girl looking so serious. She was very busy playing with her B*arbies.
Her animals & B*arbies are always very affectionate. She's quite the hugger, my girl. I've rubbed off on her. I can't help but love on her all the time- she's so darn cute!!

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